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Friday, December 29, 2006

Our mothers, our wives.... cleanliness in mind..foods for thoughts..

Let me share with you about cleanliness, hygiene to be exact. Since I am always looking at health at a 4 angled dimension, I have come across numerous cases of women who suffered swollen, stiff, painful hands. Most of these women's hands are bruised, discolored, full of scars, and felt the numbness of the whole hand.

Maybe it is no new things to you, maybe you are one of them, maybe it is your mother or maybe it is your maid, or maybe it is your neighbor or friends. These women had suffered ever since they realized what were expected of a woman, as a mother or as a daughter-in-law! These women and their responsibilities of doing things as expected by everyone. These women were all to understand the meaning of a 'home-maker'.

Hear me, listen to me, NEVER EVER despise or look down upon an old woman, or your mother, your aged mother, who had sacrificed and suffered for the family. Her back bent, her face wrinkled, her hands sored, her weak legs, her toothless mouth, her slow movements, her pigmented hands, her constant sighs, her stiff and numb limbs, her carelessness, her lack of memories and her age..... Do you know that once upon a time, she was a pretty lady with dimples in her face, sparkles in her eyes and a smooth complexion, fair in complexion and attracted so many man? She was wrong to have attracted your father, that was what I mean? If your father has allowed such a tragedy to happen to her at that age.

She was spent! She was exploited! She was treated like a 'slave', a more correct word to describe a home-maker! Totally out of shape when compared to her younger days where she was ever so carefree! They are totally spent! Because of YOU and ME!

Alright, things are about how one thinks. How one looks at things. If a female or a girl is to know or could actually perceive what was expected of her when she marry, give birth, be a woman and a mother and those tedious jobs expected of her, no one wants to get married. Nothing is ever changed in this society, that what is expected of a woman. Nothing can be altered, nothing is being done.

Just to let those who had never tasted of being a 'home-maker', let me make a list of what most of these women are doing at home.

[1] wake up early [to do their washing, cleaning, boiling water, preparing of breakfast for the family....keeping constant contact with water]

[2] sweeping and tidying up their rooms, some have to mop their homes everyday

[3] cleaning the toilets, not just one, but a few

[4] feed and look after the babies[no limits to age, get what I mean?]

[5] put their clothes out to dry

[6] collect the clothes to be folded and ironed

[7] run after the sun to dry their clothes especially during the rainy seasons

[8] tidying up includes every single things expected out of her in the kitchen, sitting rooms, studies, sleeping rooms, balcony, verandas, bathrooms...

[9] the tedious work of dish-washing after every meals [constant contact with dish, clothes, toilet cleaners]

[10] attending to the needs of every members of the family

[11] some also attending to the aged, the sick and the handicapped, their siblings, their relatives...

[12] and be stressed with loads of work expected of her routine work

[13] and the buying, choosing, preparing, cleaning, cooking of the 3 meals

[14] and the constant exposure of heat, cooking gas, electricity, hot waters when cooking

[15] and spending at least 3 hours in the kitchen, 1 hour to do the laundry, few hours in the cleaning up and etc..

[16] some have pets to look after too

[17] some have plants and flowers to look after too

[18] some have to still go to work in the garden or in the office

[19] some have to go out to work too, especially to be other people's home-maker

[20] some are also part-time breadwinner, exchanging a few dollars for labour

Goodness me, I dread to continue writing all these things... I will be again experiencing the tightening of my throat and tears maybe...

I can't possibly finish all the minute details of what are expected by a home-maker. My dear friends, I don't care whether you are a female or a male, do you ever understand or give a minute what our mothers, our sisters, our wives are doing? Do you ever stop to look and feel and be concerned with your home-makers? Do you notice how precious these women are? Can you stop complaining about her poor job not done to your order or in your way? Have you ever hug them and say the word 'I understand, I thank you for everything, and you are the best in my heart?' Do you ever reward them? Do you ever stop to give just a hand for a few minutes? Can't you think of any ways to lessen their jobs?

The worst of all, no holidays for all these home-makers. You will feel it the most when your home-maker is sick. Falling flat with all the burdens of work expected and not expected of her. She wanted to be serving well her loved family. She has sacrificed her life for all. She has suffered and contributed her time, her precious youth and strength for being a home-maker. And the stress of being a good home-maker.... the lists will go on and on...

So, that is why I am writing this article to make aware anyone, or anybody who has such a good home-maker at home in the keeping. I am trying to point out that these women, these home-makers needed to be treasured.

Whenever these women stretched out their hands to let me have a look, I always kept back my tears, I always felt their sufferings untold, I always felt their sacrifices and pains as a home-maker. I can feel their anxieties, their worries, their tedious jobs as a mother and keeping a home. And I always tell them I treasure their hands, blessing them and kissing their hands in my heart[without telling them], and told them, these hands are most precious to me, it tells me a story that no one knows, it tells me the story of love of a woman, of a mother and I salute them and told them that they have the most beautiful and useful hands in this world.

Believe me, I will always spare my time to tell them the importance of cleanliness in our mind... which is more important then that of external or outward cleanliness. It is not that I don't emphasize on home cleanliness, what I mean is that our mind needs to be 'cleansed' too. I told them to take a break, reduce some of their daily tedious cleaning. Our mind needs the cleaning. Our brain needs the weekly cleaning, our mind needs to be refreshed, to be uninstalled, to rid off negatives and those meaningless worries and to be fed with the necessary foods for thoughts, foods for our brain....

foods for our brain, cleansing of our mind, to un-install negatives by installing love and positive thoughts. How to encourage a home-maker or anybody to be installing positiveness and love into our brain, our mind so as to obtain a quality mental attitude. And be free of those 'dirts' inside our brain. These 'dirts' are invisible, intangible, untouchable and cannot be cleansed using any detergents.... no ordinary detergents can do the job well... That is why my blog will contain foods for thoughts, foods for our mind.... how to un-install those 'dirts' in our mind. It takes time and is pain-staking... fear not, it will work...it WILL work one day.....

the days will come for these home-makers to live a more meaningful and healthier life, to throw far away those 'dirts' and leave behind worries and tension and stress of being a house-wife. Empathy...practise empathy when you understand!

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